From Obtaining Lost Items To a Strange Trend In Extra-curricular Sports

Someone saved some of my stuff for me. I haven't shown my thanks to them yet, but I am planning to surprise them with something custom-made, for sure.

 In that treasure pile they provided, I had a road atlas. Yes!

 I gently placed it on the corner of the bed while I worked to store all of the other goodies in the closet space that I'm provided.

 Once I returned to the huge book, I flipped to a Randoom page and pointed at a town.

 The town was very small, so I wanted another.

 This next town was just a bit bigger. I wanted honest-to-god cities, not suburban satellites.

 What do you know, I hit Albequerque.

 Started reading up on the place and it's quite a story, but not this one.

 The one thing that stood out to me was the listing of it's sister cities.

 Sister cities are beneficial ties that any city can make with another in the world, upon agreement.

 It was a snore-fest looking at the list, if I'm honest, but I laugh in my sleep and found a peculiar oddity.

 Most of the cities were tied to others in different countries. Not Waikiki, Hawaii's. No.

 It's sister city is Bixby, Oklahoma. I haven't ever been there, but something in me wanted to go a little further here.

 Bullet is the name of their rag. I'm down for flaunting the second amendment, but I'm not sure that's where they were going when they named it. Anyway, I checked out the latest issue and was in insta-shock when I saw the front page.

Woah, just wait a freakin' minute!

 What? For those that can't tell from the pic, those boys are playing a version of Quidditch, from the Harry Potter series.

 I saw this and was instantly inflamed. Apologies to all the fans, and J.K. Rowling if offense is taken by these next logical statements.

 First, there is a flying ball in quidditch. I've not watched the full movie sets, but I do know that rule. That was the rule that made it cool to me. That is the one rule that if they ignore, they're all just playing a version of polo with a plain jane volleyball, while riding on brooms.

 Why make an actual extra-curricular activity from the Potter series? Because it's popular. I wish it were because the game is cool, but alas, it's not too exciting when compared to the silver screen version.

 I can think of several different games that only exist in fiction that should become school sports. Number one of all is Orson Scott Card's battle room from his Ender's Game series.

 "Wait, Shock. You are expecting children to shoot a freezing adhesive at each other while flying around a room in zero gravity with ropes and such?", asks my even-more-cynical invisible girlfriend.

 "Ah, just wait for technology to catch up. I'll even start getting interested in this Quidditch game,

                                                  WHEN BALLS FLY!"

Hurdles, Roadbumps, and Occupational Hazards

 Recently, I've been a little nostalgic for a certain MMO. I used to be addicted to this thing so bad that it was like breathing air. I had to play every single day. I was such an addict that I refused to pay a monthly fee, and went with a lifetime account option.

 One day I didn't play, then the next was without the game. Pretty soon, I had realized that I had not logged in for a while. I kept up with the new updates when they'd come out. I'd log in, check it out, and then log off. It just didn't have the appeal that it used to.

 The game changed hands in the intervening years, giving the title a new life. It was something that made me want to log back in and play around in the new areas.

Hurdle one, the  e-mail account I had used when signing up was no longer valid. It was tied to an ISP that I had since dropped. So, I forgot a bunch of details like my incredibly hard to remember username. I'm remembering that it had alternate caps and lowercase letters, so no one but me could log in. Ha, a good idea at the time, but I have since forgotten such name and have wiped all memory of the title off of my hard drive.

 I e-mailed the new company of my problem. They responded wanting all sorts of info that I could not get to, being that the e-mail addy was no longer available. 

 So now, I'm negotiating with the customer service rep to give me access, even though I don't have access to the original email. The person is now willing to pare down the essential info that I need to provide to two memorable pieces of info. I hope I get them right.

 I have decided to attend college. I have never done so, and seeing as how the job market is so bleak, I thought I'd pursue an education that may allow me more choice in career.

 The amount of hoops to go through almost seems endless. It's almost as if they're weeding out the weak-willed prospective students by not really giving an order in which to go about the steps to start. Everything states that you must do something else before doing that one thing, but the one thing they point you to states that the other needs to happen first. What?

 I'm to get my transcript. I won't even mention what my shot records will take. Tough cookies. I tried this before, and the school that I graduated from is still holding my transcript hostage for some handsome sum, like a ransom. This is due to my hoarding of textbooks and library books.I also used them for various unconventional experiments that the books never withstood. I wasn't aware that they kept records so well. Darn administrators. But they know not who they are dealing with. I will find a way to get that piece of paper that gives me the right to closer to my role in higher ed.

 Occupational hazards are sometimes worth the trouble. I was a mason's helper for a while. It was pretty fun, but the one time I was checking the hopper for the consistancy of the mortar, Boom! right in the eye. My safety glasses were not doing their job. I ended up washing my eyeball so much that I could pass for a Ren and Stimpy eye model, red veins and all.

Image grabbed from

srqpix

Update: I've since beaten one of the hurdles. Made a ss of it:

  Thanks for letting me rant, I'll do funny next time, pinky swar.

I've Got a Mega Memory

 A long time ago, our family invested in a series of audio cassettes called "Mega-Memory". I was enthralled with how the brain worked and how to improve what I had.

 Although I wasn't a very good student, I would almost ace every test that I was given. I did not enjoy homework at all. My belief was that if they wished me to be schooled on my time, they ought to come over to my house and make sure it got done. That never happenned, so I ended up failing some classes that graded heavily on homework. For that reason, we started the MM course.

 I'm not sure how that was going to help me do homework, but the subject matter was so interesting that I gladly sat at the dining room table, with pen and paper at the ready when Dad would play the tapes.

 The first lessons had to deal with 'pegs'. The narrator had likened them to wooden dowels, but once I heard the word 'pegs upon a wall', my wild imagination had put pirates on the other side with only their peg-legs sticking out from what we were seeing.

 These pegs were static of nature. Each number was given an image. They are as follows

 1. Tree
 2. Light Switch
 3 Stool
 4. Car
 5. Glove
 6. Revolver
 7. Dice
 8. Skate
 9. Cat
10. Bowling Pin
11. Field Goal posts
12. Carton of eggs
13. Cauldron
14. Golden ring
15. Paycheck
16. Cake
17. Magazine
18. Voting booth
19. Golf Club
20. Black Piano Keys

 The symbols for one through ten are what we were to use to remember strings of numbers, like phone numbers and addresses. The 11 through twenty I used when remembering long lists of objects or words. These pegs were so cool to me, that they've stuck in my mind from that first day of learning. A great gift, those memory tricks. Here's how I would remember the number 867-5309, if the song, "Jenny" had never come out.

 8-Skate. Now I would usually imagine someone skating, but that would not be memorable enough to recall from my databank, so I had to make it ludicrous. I would see an ice skate with eyeballs for eyelets and a lolling tongue, sliding around, looking for it's mate.

 6-Revolver. I would then see the skate find it's mate, only to view it's last moments at the end of a mean-faced revolver. The gun would laugh once the dead skate had fallen through the ice, taking it's mate with it to the afterlife.

 7-Dice. The revolver would then find money that belonged to the pair of skates and use it to play at a craps table. When throwing the dice the first time, one of the cubes would lodge into the barrel causing the revolver to stop up.

 5-Glove. The gun got so angry at the die sticking itself in it's snub-nose, that it tried firing. The bullet and dice would fly from the barrel, only to be caught by a disembodied white glove, and stuffed back into the revolver.

 3. Stool. The revolver would get very angry at the glove for stuffing back the bullet and die. It would be smoking to the point of making the metal all red. To calm down the gun would sit upon a three-legged stool. After cooling down for a moment, the revolver would then try to get up, only to find that the stool had been lined with adhesive, and stuck to this gun-butt.

 0. Bowling Pin. In a fit of rage, the gun grabbed the first thing available to knock the die and stool loose. You're right, it was a bowling pin that started eating his arms when he went to grab it.

 9. Cat. Morris the cat was in attendance at this particular cat table and proceeded to stop all the action with a very loud growl/hiss combo that sent all objects scattering. He would then clean himself and purr away.

 Not only did this course that my father had purchased help my memory, it was something that fostered my imagination as well.

 Now if I could only get past the first sentence of the speed reading course, I'd be able to read 1000 blogs a day!

The Search for Funds or Quest to Buy Blogger's Books

 I've been on and off for a couple of days, so I'm asking for forgiveness for not catching up on reading and comments. Enough grovelling, let's get to this post.

Before that, this bear also begs your forgiveness. From Eric Kilby's Flickr

 There are a few of my favorite bloggers that have published books. I am such a great reader and friend that I want to buy those. Unfortunately, I have little to no money for that pursuit, so I've been looking for a part-time job to afford my new addiction.

I have not done well at  recent interviews. I used to ace those things right off of the bat before, but this time I'm flubbing hardcore. It's as if my subconscious is taking control and making sure that my search for work continues. My work ethic is something carved from granite, and my ego seems to have been transformed into blasa wood. 

Balsa wood may be brittle, but it makes beautiful magazine stands. via  Colinaut's Flicker

 Looking in the classifieds today, I found something right up my alley. "Brick wall artist needed". I'm not sure if they want a graffiti artist or a mural expert. Either way, I'll try it out and see if I can beautify a spot on wall somewhere, and in turn, get some money to buy some of the books that my fellow bloggers have published.

Maybe I'll be good enough to make something this eye-catching. via Tony Haex's flicker

 So, I'm off to the hunt for monetary gain. Remember, one man's chump change is another man's life savings.

 Before I leave you, I'll upload one of my last images. A radioactive ninja star goat's head burr.

Sometimes known as the ninja cockleburr of intense pain

What my first job taught me

Welcome back to my page, you awesome people! I am honored that you would wish to come back to this corner of the blogosphere to see what I have in store.

 Today, I will speak on one of my beginnings. Some paths have since diverged, but I still have transferable gifts from those paths that I can use just about anywhere. Let me get to it, or this post will end up being very long.

 My beginnings as a  worker-

 At the age of 13, I was gainfully employed by the local paper. It was not as a paperboy, a position in which I held the highest esteem, because the video game bearing the same title was one of my favorites. No, I was the door-to-door salesman.

 Back then, the paper didn't cost as much as it did these days, so it was fairly easy to persuade people to get it. The paper I sold was printed and delivered three times a week and only cost around fifteen dollars for a whole year's worth. That was a great deal, even then. I had no trouble selling in the affluent sections of the suburbs.

 The challenge came in convincing people to take up the rag in the urban and rural areas around my town. I had a way to sell to everyone, for example:

 Potential Customer(PC)-"I'm sorry, strapping young lad, but I can't afford it."

 Me- "I can understand that, sir. You can afford a vehicle, I see."

 PC- "Yes, but what does that have to do with me not taking the paper?"

 Me- "If you were to fill your gas tank 3 times*, then drive around the city, you still wouldn't find out as much information in a day that we would be providing you for a full year."

 PC- "Since you put it that way, I can see how this is a great deal. Sign me up."

 Then there were those that I would have to sell by employing showmanship. A popular television commercial in that area was pretty annoying to me, but it was something that everyone else seemed to have loved . A tiny guy in a cowboy hat would have someone off-screen toss him a product from the left side of the screen, and would talk about it, then toss it to the right side. He would then catch another from the left, and so on. I used this same technique with different sections of the paper, and it had the desired effect. People would instantly see that my imitation of the commercial guy was good and they'd get to laughing. Once I had them giggling at my antics, I knew it was an easy sale after that.

 That job taught me some valuable lessons. I learned to consider a persons needs versus my wants. If I really knew that a person would be making their children go without if they bought from me, I'd botch the sale. There weren't too many of those, so I'd usually make up for them at the next house.

 It was also a lesson in courage. I was a very shy child, and this job helped me climb out of my shell to approach strangers. Taking those steps have helped me immensely, although I am still shy in some situations.

 My first job was one of many, and has helped me gain the experience I need to relate to my fellow humans.

 What was your first job?

*way back in the day when five bucks would  fill your tank, I know, I'm ancient.

Have most of a tasty burger on me!

Award and Sunday Stealings

So, Infinite Plans has passed along a cool award to me.

 The Liebster Award

 I must follow the rules in order to accept it properly, so here they are:

1. Link back to the person who gave you the award. Infinite Plans is here, the Infinite GP is here. I like going both places, so be a dear and show him love from mine.


2. Pick 5 people deserving of the award and notify them on their blogs.


  I. Jéanne from Barefoot Girl

 II. Tracie from Crack You Whip

III. That Bastard From Bellingham at The Pen Is My Sword

IV. Cranface at The Cranface Chronicles

  V. Omnislash at Omni's Personal Blog

and rule number

 3.Post the award on your blog and spread the love.


 So here it is, for all of my deserving recipients to grab and place. You are great blogs and I liebster you.

And it's still Sunday somewhere, so I'm going stealing with Sunday Stealing. A meme originated on WTIT: The Blog authored by Bud Weiser.


 I have an addictive personality. I tend to let things grow on me so much that I end up doing the ones I like again, and again, until it becomes somewhat of a problem. This is a series of questions*my current addiction, and my answers. I didn't post all 99 of them, but I saw this set and thought I'd have a go at it.


 76) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship? 


 A mixture of compliments and tact, as well as a good measure of communication and personal space.


77) How did/could someone win your heart?


 In a saw-esque claw machine, you know the kind that you get the fluffy animals from, but this time It'd be my icy heart.


78) In your world, what brings on more creativity?


 Other's creativity. I can't tell you how many times someone else's venture into the risky and unknown territory of originality had such a profound effect on me, that I would immediately go home and expand on those feelings of inspiration.


79) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?


 Not giving up. I've been told that what I want to do is 'impossible'. I have promised myself that until I draw my final breath, it will be to prove that I can do this, and that I will not quit.


80) Why did you break up with your last ex?


 She kept blaming her mistreatment of me on her mental disorders. I really grew to care for her, but I became unwilling to spend time with her once she became unwilling to budge about the issues that we had. Don't get me wrong, I have my issues too, but I will never transform my problems into excuses to treat others like dung.


81) What would you want to be written on your tombstone?


  "I'm still here, look behind you!"


82) What is your favorite word?


 Lingualumina


83) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word: delusional.


 Grand Canyon

84) What is a saying you use a lot?


 "You can't have no in your heart"-Joe Dirte


85) Are you watching Idol this season? If yes, how do you like it?


 I am not. I haven't watched it for years. It was mainly a bonding thing, so eh.


86) Were you surprised that House got canceled?


 Not really, I was surprised when it came out. I thought Ted Danson had cornered the market on dickhead doctors with Becker.


87) What is your current desktop picture?

definitely looks better on my desktop

88) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?


 I would make my mother explode




 with joy from being the biggest lottery winner, ever!


 haha, gotcha on that one!


89) What would be a question where you'd not tell the truth?


 Are you handsome?


90) One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by WEEPING ANGELS. The Weeping Angles aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What would you do?


 I would rise to the center in song. My human voice would sing lyrics of how grateful I am that those same angels were the ones that have saved me from multiple deaths. 




91) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?


 To see a glow around genuinely good people. That way, I'd never accidentally befriend a betrayer.


92) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?


 I'd have to say it'd be a family get-together back at my grandparent's farm. My brother and cousin were also there, so I'd have all the deceased members of my family to have another conversation with. That and we'd be fishing, just letting the time slip away in comfortable silence.


93) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?


 I would erase the idea of erasing any memory. The horrible experiences of my past are there to teach me lessons that I do not repeat in the future. So I'm keeping them, keeping them all.


94) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. (let's say that you are both single and available) Who might it be?

 I actually don't think I would make it past first base. With expectation high for this 'date', I'd feel very awkward the whole night and probably abstain to retain some self respect, and to leave no room for rumour hounds like TMZ to be all over my lawn the next day.




  But I would choose to date Zooey Deschanel She'd be ultra-cool with us not having to give in to pressures, and also be fine with just knitting popcorn quilts while listening to jazzy tunes..

95) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?


 This minute's answer is Hong Kong. I always wanted to go there, and now I'll see where master IP trained Bruce Lee. Cool!


96) Do you have any relatives or friends in jail?


 No


97) Who's winning the U.S. Republican presidential nomination? Why?


 Romney. Because politicians cheat.


98) Who's winning the next U.S. Presidential election?


 An animal. Or an alien. Or an alien animal. I'd take any of those in favor of what we've had for the past 4 years.


99) If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?


 I wouldn't say a word, but a make a clicking sound that would tickle everyone's ear so much that they'd pee their pants. I would then go walking and have a laugh at everyone else's expense.






 P.S. I am in the middle of two graphics requests. I'm doing a KAOS radio logo for Bastard, and an Angry button for Angry Lurker. Those should be done and posted by tomorrow night. Thank you all for visiting and I will be returning and catching up.


 Until then, don't let the web become sticky....use some cooking oil.

Taking Requests and Impromptu Poetry

Not only do I have a writing bug that bites upon my brain, I also dabble in graphic design to satiate my digital brain zombie-hunger. That's why I'm taking requests for Randoomly customized art.

Requests for shiny buttons, ostentatiously gaudy awards, and epic event graphics are what I'm soliciting today.

All for free.

I have obtained some new programs that kick my creative side into gear. I manipulate the image there, then go through it to polish the images off with my older, more familiar programs. The hammering out of most of the wrinkles that line my skill-set, occur only when I put my creative muscle to good use by practicing and advancing.

I need practice, perfect practice. I can work on my own all day and keep doing variants of the same thing. OCD 'mental-tunnel-vision' ,(not a real disorder symptom, but a self-made cheap life coach term I use) keeps me on task too effectively. I've also self diagnosed a new ADD symptom, as well. Tab-o-rama tempts me into keep clicking new tabs open to see what page they land on. I do all this while working on my own projects,but maybe not others. By taking a risk by reaching out, this might help me conquer the distractedness and stagnation, and in turn, provide you some tasty randoom graphics in return for your loyalty to my little corner of randoomness.

Give me a shout if you'd like a banner, button, award, or anything else made,on my twitter, or my G+., or here at GFC, (for as long as that lasts).

I need a bit of information in order to make something that you'd enjoy looking at.

 Things that I need, are:

 Type/size- Button, Banner, or Custom Award. I have some template sizes for all, but if you want a specific size, please specify what size you'd like.

 Color palate- If you have preferences towards colors, let me know. I have my own favorites that I like to use, but the more specific you an be on what colors you want elements of the graphic, the better.

 Elements- The shapes/objects that make up the graphic and their placement. I'm not too good with realism, being that my main strength is abstraction, but I can attempt whatever you request. The more realistic you would like an element, the longer it will take.

 Words/Font- Let me know what type of font you would like and what layout you would like the text, if you would like words on your graphic.

 I don't really expect too many requests, but in the case that my plate becomes full, I will edit this post to reflect that I'm no longer taking requests.

 I doesn't matter what you do with the graphic once I've made it. You can print it on a poster and make money(I've made a few small amounts of cash from printing a few things of mine out, it helps in a pinch), or you could plaster it on toilet paper and keep it in the guest room to impress VIPs. It doesn't matter to me the use, just that I get to practice, and hopefully please a few of you.

 I love all of your blogs, every last one of them, all over a thousand of them. I really need to cull my reader. I always bite off more than I can chew. If I do not visit or comment, I will get to it. If I do not, a well placed "HEY OVER HERE!!!" comment is a great way to notify me of my tardiness to your page. I have always feared tardiness.

 I also fear the grammar nazi, the punctuation polititians, and the language law force. My apologies to all departments of said institutions for the breakings of your rules. I will still elude you, but in a way that keeps both you, and me learning, so that when you finally.

 With that all out of the way, I will now write a tiny, brand new, shiny poem.

  Waves crash along my spine,

             pitting destiny against my soul.

    Rocks stand in the way of life,
             
             threatening abstinence upon flowered heart.
             
     Ego bends, crumples, and falls,

              one last look inside gritty mind.
     
      Tumbling, I slip away,

               to the mortal end, that I knew I'd find.

feel the dizzy, embrace the nausea

No, really, what I make you will hopefully turn out 100% better!